Leaving the Year 2012

This is going to be my last blog entry for the year 2012 and tomorrow will be another year to flourish and I just really wanted to start 2013 with a bang. I know it was really difficult for me this year as I have encountered so much problems affecting both my emotional and physical aspect and this was due to the awakening process I have undergone. As we enter another year, I wanna leave that emotional baggage in stored in 2012. That outgoing event in my life will serve as something to remember and it was really a challenging year for me. I wanna leave all those old that that no longer serve me. In my end, I wanna start anew, something that would make me different from the previous years and in that way I know that God has something in store for me. I won't expect anything but I could only hope for the best.

Shattered dreams and bad moments in my life are part of my aspect effecting me so much and today, I AM leaving everything in 2012 that is no longer serving me. May God bless us all.

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Talim Island in Binangonan

Yesterday, getting to Talim Island was a surprised plan, although two days ago I was supposed to go there but due to bad weather I decided to cancel the plan. I was clueless though what is in store in that island although I made some few researches on the internet. But about a year ago, I was in Libis, Binangonan where the port is located going to Talim and that gave me an insight about the razor-shaped island. I did not take the map seriously from the internet that I did research to, but both gave me some insights about the island.

So it was a pleasant surprise that I made yesterday going to the island and upon the arrival at the port in Libis there were couple of motorboats berthing in the port waiting for passengers. I did asked the people out there about Talim and where the popular Tagapo peak was located in Baranggay Janosa, a quite popular climbing place to some mountaineers. From the blog that I read on the internet, you can see the overview of Ortigas Center and Makati skyline once you have reached the peak. I was quite confused about Tagapo where I asked some locals where it is situated since a lot of motorboats are available off to different .

Going to Talim is over an hour motorboat ride, so I arrived later in the afternoon and already quite impossible to get into the top of the mountain. Motorboats have a trip schedules so I don't think that I would be able to make it in Tagapo. I bumped with a tour guide in Talim so he told me everything about hiking in Tagapo.

Although my stay in Talim was just a couple of hours, I did enjoy the place and took some photos of the place. The next time around would be more interesting since I would be doing a mountain climbing in Tagapo  peak.

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Could You Be Messiah

Perhaps there are times in our lives that we felt so down and helpless needing someone to stand for you and reach out the best way they can. Perhaps you were looking for some people who will understand you and be at your side. We need people who can be a messiah, someone who can give us a hand and let their hearts open to much more understanding from how we painfully melt emotionally. In the burden that we are partaking, we grasp for solution, and we need someone to talk to us and feel the unconditional love that we are yearning for in times like this,

I have found this song and perhaps this resonates to all of us. Popularized by Gary Valenciano, the song called "Could You Be Messiah".

could you be HEALER?

to a heart that's been wounded

in a battle that's never seen?

could you be TEACHER?

to a mind of confusion

tell me what does this for me?

are you DELIVERER?

of an imprissoned feeling in chains

can you set my spirit free?

And just one more question

allow me this question

could you be MESSIAH to me?

could you be MESSIAH to me?

could you be FATHER?

to a soul that's been abandoned

by a world too busy to hear?

could you be FRIEND?

to a helpless survivor?

can you take away my fears?

I heard them all sharing

this newfound conviction in them

Are you all they made you to be?

And just one more question

allow me this question

could you be MESSIAH,

please be MESSIAH to me..

Now I've been looking for

someone like you

and I'm so tired, I'm tired

I've read every book,

and I've sang every song

my mind may be right

but my heart feels so wrong

Tell me how much further

can my life go along

which way do the roads lead

where do I belong?

Are you FORGIVER

of my most unknown secrets?

PROVIDER of all that I need?

can you be BROTHER?

the one who knows better

would you now stand in the lead?

When all this is over,

all the thunder and lightning

in the daylight just what will I see?

The answers to my questions,

to all of my questions..

Could you be MESSIAH to me?

Could you be MESSIAH to me?

Could you be MESSIAH,

please be MESSIAH to me.

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Christmas In Manila Bay

I wish everyone a Merry Christmas!.

Just yesterday, I was in Manila Bay in Roxas Blvd where I took some shots of the setting sun. The photo shoot I have done was quite success since I was able to catch the sun before it disappears from the bay. But unfortunately during the night time, taking a shot for the river lights was not quite good, for it was my first time to do it.

As this day is Christmas, I came back to the bay for another photo shoot but the sun was hiding. So I waited  for the night time and successfully I was able to manually set my camera for a city light and river flow shots. It turned out to be good though. Below is my shot for the the city light done while I was up on the bridge and I think this was good enough though.

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The Setting Sun In Manila Bay

 Part of my reflection is to travel places and take some photos, and usually I have done out of town travels. It's quite expensive though and I think the plan had to be taken back seat in the meantime. Communing to the nature is one way to release my tension and it is indeed a panacea whatever the cases that I've been partaking in the past. And that is why, it is important to spend some time rusticating to different places and usually what I do is the backpacking style.

Yesterday I decided to go to Manila Bay in Roxas Blvd just to catch for the setting sun. From Luneta Park I started walking till I reached the bay side. The last time I was in this area was in June but that was quite a bit short just passing the place after I visited my sister in law who stayed in one of the hotels in Malate.

Staying in Manila Bay was simply beautiful as I was able to capture the setting sun though some photos turned out to be blurry. I got the clouds, the ships berthing in the middle of the sea and of course the sunset. Seeing the setting sun was such a nice feeling and I feel I had gained some energies out from the scenery. Staying in the boulevard and seeing some glimpse of the people around ends a perfect day for me.

I think I need another time to spend my day in that boulevard again and it will be no surprise if I get back there again one of these days.

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I Want To Live In Batanes

 It's been over a year now since the last time I visited Batanes Island where I spent 8 days in that blissful place. Paradase - is what I describe the place, but internally, I have this indescribable feeling overriding me the moment I think about the place. The beauty of the setting sun and the picture-perfect is what makes me remind of the few moments I spent in that island found in the north as you can hear the sound of the roaring sea is like a music to my ear.

During the course of my traveling experience in the Philippines, I have never seen such paradise as Batanes even Boracay will never surpass its beauty.Not a typical commercialized beach resort and that's the good thing about its local they were able to preserve the island's natural beauty, and it was never altered to become a commercial tourist destination. The aura of the island magnetizes a traveler like me to come back and spend more time, know more about the place itself, and of course the warmth people of Batanes-the Ivatan.

My curiosity in Batanes started when I saw the place on T.V. with Armida Segiuon - Reyna show's called "Aawitan Kita", several years back. Then I craved when my I traveled to places and the good about the internet and reading about the blogger's experience and seeing some of the photos is what made me become more interested. I made some few researches, planned the whole thing for over 6 months and then, that was it!

I feel the good vibes in Batanes. The serenity of the place, and the simple life of the indigenous Ivatan  are some of the deciding factors that attract me to spend some time in Batanes. Of course the fresh vegetables which I intend to become a pure vegetarian soon.

I know I am in the spiritual awakening and reflection is being needed to someone like me so I could commune to the beauty of nature and rusticating is such a wonderful experience that I could ever have. In that way, I would become more attached to the nature as this gives more energy for my own being.

As we enter the year 2013, is a time to make up my mind to some few things that I really want to do and focus on before I can truly make myself conditioned to pick up these broken pieces and the things I have missed out. I want to live in Batanes for quite some time. I would need a lot of preparations to implement the plan and that would take some time. This time, living in Batanes would focus about myself, meditating and praying. In that way, I have a solid foundation of myself as soon as I am ready to come back and shine again, be whole and ready to face my own destiny.

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Following My Own Self

It's December 21, 2012 or 12/21/12. I don't think about this date as the end of the world, end of the 26,000 cycle, the Mayan Calendar or anything  related to this date whether it is phenomena, mystical, metaphysical or spiritual. What I think about is CHRISTMAS, haha, that's 4 days left in the room whereas we celebrate this yuletide season with our family or loved ones. So what's in store for me this coming December 25? I guess it's the same thing that I did during the last Christmases.

If there's something that I think about is my spiritual journey and I know that being in this realm is full of spiritual tsunami. I get a lot of emotional ups and downs this year, my dreams are becoming more vivid as some times it tells about what is going to happen. I think about crossing the borderline and walking the path till I reach the end of the line. Wave of emotions, this is what I am experiencing every day in my life since the beginning of the year and it was really really hard to cope up and stop all these chaos.

Life for me is a roller-coaster, and I am still learning a lot to become more resilient, preserve my values, to learn what I should ought to learn and to know about myself truly, learning how to trust my instinct and learn more about God. I guess both religion and spirituality doesn't have to do with my own personal belief, because I have my own that I don't follow everything when it comes to religion and spirituality.


I don't follow traditional spirituality and I don't really believe in everything that I read whether it's in the book or information that I gather from the internet. I follow my own self, my heart and my instinct and free from anything that I read. And I am not too much when it comes to what you call esoteric realm that can somehow be profound and some I found it too weird already. God made everything simple in this world. Just believe in God, Jesus as the only Saviour, do good to humans. Just  KISS (keep it simple, stupid!) And you don't need to know this so called "Forbidden Knowledge". Just find God in your heart and that's it! As far as religion is concerned, I don't have to follow traditions, I don't have to go church every Sunday and everything that is said and imposed by any religious belief. But I detach myself from stereotyping and perceiving some people in the same realm as one box. And that I respect what they believe in.

And lastly, I work for my own growth and was hoping that everything happened to me is going to be over soon. It's not easy to take that spiritual journey as Dark Night of the Soul comes along, and it does consume me emotionally and physically.

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Miss U.S.A. Wins Miss Universe 2012

Misses Philippines and USA. Photo courtesy of
 Janine Mari Raymundo Tugonon
Facebook Page

Early today, I watched the Miss Universe Pageant via Starworld, and live from Las Vegas, Nevada, USA where Philippines' bet Janine Tugonon placed second to USA's Olivia Culpo. I thought or I would say that most people thought Miss Philippines would take home the crown and among the top 5, she was the clear winner as she nailed the question and answer portion. From my Facebook alone, judging her photos during the preliminary competition, I was pretty much sure that she would make the cut in the top 16 finalists. And yes she did! Janine has a Miriam Quiambao vibe, who was also the first runner up in the 1999 Miss Universe Pageant. This is the third year that Philippines was among the top 5 since 2010 when Venus Raj was fourth runner up, and Shamcey Supsup was third runner up in 2011. Will the Philippines continue the streak in 2013? All of them almost got the crown! Otherwise if they did, we'll have 5 Miss Universe already. Gloria Diaz and Margie Moran were Miss Universe 1969 and 1973 respectively.

Just before watching the pageant and seeing their photos from my Facebook feed, I had a feeling though, that Miss U.S.A. was going to take home the crown.

So Here's the result:

Miss Universe - U.S.A.
Second Place - Philippines
Third Place - Venezuela
Fourth Place - Australia
Fifth Place - Brazil

Finalists:

Hungary
Mexico
South Africa
Russia
France

Quarter Finalists

Poland
Peru
Kosovo
Croatia
India
Turkey

Hope to see next year to have another feat for the Philippines.

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Simbang Gabi

I can't remember the last time I attended the Simbang Gabi, prior to attending the mass this early morning. I can't even remember who I was with that time, whether I was with my family or friends, memories are vague and not a single facet I could recall in time. As far as I know, it was ages ago since the last time I did the Simbang Gabi. I was not even a devotee and to tell you honestly, I always find myself being bored during the mass. So I go to church whenever I feel going not following the Sunday service. Just the way I feel comfortable going to church is only the time I go on my own way. My family, especially from my father's side was a pure devotee, especially my lolas who were strict in terms of novena. To mention that my lola, my father's mom, was one of the hermanas and founder of Our Lady of Biglang Awa in Boac, Marinduque. My late aunt was a nun and other aunties were also a pure devotee.

Anyway just this morning I went to Misa de Gallo or Simbang Gabi, and it was the first day of the said commemoration and I went as early as 4 in the morning. Was there not for curiosity but of course I wanted to feel like how it was to attend the said mass again during the yuletide season. I was so excited and I brought with me my camera for the mass and took some shots of the church and the people. The mass was full and a lot of people were outside since it was already out of space inside the church. The church was a Parish in Cainta, Rizal where I almost grew up and spent my whole life in the town.

In that course, I never skipped buying the famous "puto bumbong" and this delicacy has been popular especially in the yuletide season. For more than an hour I spent there but I didn't finish the mass, so I did a little bit prayer. It was also my first time to go to Cainta Parish Church when Christmas. But as what I was telling, I could no longer remember the last time I went to misa de gallo.

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Eleven More Days

Eleven more days to go and then it's Christmas. And we all know that most people are quite busy with their stuff and maybe some are quite ready to give out their Christmas gifts to their loved ones. And we all know that the best time for the year, maybe to most people is Christmas. Personally, memory lanes and remembering the past Christmases is what makes me yearn as it reminds me of everything that I did during Christmas. I don't travel that much if it is December because I know how meaningful it is to stay home during this season. 

Let's see what particular things I want to do this yuletide season. Ahh, I wanna hang-out maybe in Gateway or Ortigas Center.This is what I normally do just to fill up some boring moments.

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Paying Attention To The Signs

At first, I never believe on signs that much, unlike synchronicity that paves away things that happened in me. I believe what happened to me before after my mother passed away was a form of synchronicity providing me some basic tools to start my e-commerce business more than 5 years ago. It took me a year to plan ahead before my business came into form, and that was the time when my mother was suffering an ordeal which the lead cause of her death was due to rectal cancer. But I was already aware what signs are all about but not too much about it. I believe everything happened before was the universe were so generous giving me something I never had before.

Just this year alone, while in the spiritual awakening realm, it seemed that I was led to paying attention to the signs. I googled a lot about it and how the universe gives information to something that you have no idea what was all about it. Those were the signs when one is experiencing a spiritual awakening which lets me to believe more to pay attention to it. I was also led to when I ask for some confirmation, it did really work although there were some cases I was bombarded by the signs from the universe that I should trust my intuition and not to ignore it, but rather believe more about it.

It might be a little bit scary though, and it was like when you tell the people about your experience, chances are they would never believe in you.

The signs are really something that we should pay attention to, for it does the work to support what you think you would need to know about things wrapping around you but with this guidance, you get confirmations with the questions you wanted to know about. The situation may vary depending on one circumstances and experience.

Bur I had mine that I couldn't just resist to believe. It just works!

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I Love This Song...

I was supposed to record this song just before the death anniversary of my mom when she passed away 6 years ago, November 24, 2006. It was delayed due to the schedules I had then from the Boracay event. And right after the event I had to process the photos taken from that event.

The song "Iingatan Ka" sung by Carol Banawa was actually recorded in remembrance of my mom. So the recording was delayed for few weeks. I love this song for it depicts about the love of the mother to the son/daughter especially in the midst of predicaments where our mother is usually there for us.

So here it is the song I recorded:

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A Passage From The Bible

I just want to share this passage from the Bible as Jesus clearly said, "Unless a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.

John 3:1-13: “There was a man of the Pharisees named Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews. This man came to Jesus by night and said to Him, "Rabbi, we know that You are a teacher come from God; for no one can do these signs that You do unless God

 is with him." Jesus answered and said to him, "Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God." Nicodemus said to Him, "How can a man be born when he is old? Can he enter a second time into his mother's womb and be born?" Jesus answered, "Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. "That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. "Do not marvel that I said to you, 'You must be born again.' "The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear the sound of it, but cannot tell where it comes from and where it goes. So is everyone who is born of the Spirit." Nicodemus answered and said to Him, "How can these things be?" Jesus answered and said to him, "Are you the teacher of Israel, and do not know these things? "Most assuredly, I say to you, We speak what We know and testify what We have seen, and you do not receive Our witness. "If I have told you earthly things and you do not believe, how will you believe if I tell you heavenly things? "No one has ascended to heaven but He who came down from heaven, that is, the Son of Man who is in heaven.

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Now December

Wow, it's hard to believe, it's already December and that means Christmas Season! Well am I excited? yeah why not. Time really flies so fast that we've been aware that 24 more days to come and again, we celebrate Christmas once again. Some of us reminds us when we were kids and how we celebrate the yuletide season with your amily. It makes us reminisce our childhood years, and maybe we thought that we were still little kids when we used to receive special gifts from our loved ones. Reminds me too when I was small, our family including uncle, auntie and cousins we used to have a reunion. This may be the thought that you once had but of course we had lots more about our kid experience.

Thinking about last Christmas, not really a good once because you know something happened to one of the members of our family, when my brother passed. Things from the past though makes me understand that life should be like that, the good and the bad things happened to us and how we've learned from our experiences, cope up with the problem that life has bring.

I was thinking about my spiritual awakening triggered to me after the death of my brother. The experience was already there before hand and at the same time, I never thought that some important people will come into your life orchestrated by the Universe as part of the divine plan. I'm talking also about my connection too . And awakening started in the mid year of 2011 when I noticed seeing number sequences like 11:11 in digital clocks, my cellular phone, plate numbers like 111, 222, 333, etc. It all started from there, triggered with some situations.

But you know what, I've never thought I would gone this far, for I believe I was already spiritually enlightened. I can feel the energy. Although some emotional situation is still there but I know I've come to pass the stage.

Recently, I was assigned as a travel photography in the event held in Boracay, Aklan bumping to a life coach in the airport prior to arriving to Boracay. She was the trainor of the Boot Camp there, introducing herself as Business and Life Coach of that event where I was invited as official photographer while in Manila. A friend responsible for tours who handled the event already gave me some insights about her few weeks before the event, and I even mentioned to my friend that I wanted to meet her. And there she goes, it happened while unexpectedly I was assigned to be the photographer of the Boot Camp.

During the course of that event, I was listening, though never part of it, it's just that I picked up something valuable that has to be applied in my recent situation, She is light to talk with, possesses great wisdom and positive outlook in life. It was nice talking to her learning a lot of things from her.

Well this could be one of the divine purpose given to me by the universe meeting some important people in my life.

In the path I am partaking, I've known too much and was enlightened now ready to take another course in life in my spiritual journey.

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My Boracay Experience

Going to Boracay was never been one of my few favorite tourist spots that I would want to visit. But as this jewel island was considered as one of the best beaches in the world, my head turned on to this tourist destination the moment I had invitation to visit the place and cover the event for TVI Express. The original plan was to get there to take some photo shots for White Sands and Aqua Sports, but I nodded my head with excitement as soon as I was offered as an official photographer for TVI Express. Compared to my previous travels which was purely a leisure experience, going to Boracay was a job that I was so happy in doing the course.

The event took place in November 16 to 18, 2012.

At the Manila Domestic Airport in Pasay bound Aklan

A newly built Crown Regency in Boracay

We met up early as 5 p.m. in Pasay at Domestic Airport via Zest Air bound for Aklan, There were more than 50 delegates participating in the leadership training event organized by TVI Exoress. I was the official photographer in that event and meeting Life and Business Coach Clarissa Calingasan was a pleasure. We had a short conversation upon introducing herself she organized the business in the Philippines. Just to give an overview about TVI, it was launched in the Philippines 2 years ago. It is a global network company specializing in travel and leisure. Three years ago, someone from Australia invited me to join the company but due to I was focused om my business, I have declined to join company.


We arrived Caticlan at noon time where we had a boat ride to Boracay Island. The delegates official hotel was Crown Regency Resort and Convention Center, a newly-built 5 star hotel opened last August 2012. I checked in at room 218 and immediately we took lunch at Fabulous Fifteen Cafe and the motif of the cafe was some of collectible items displayed in the place including photos and ads from the past.

Getting ready for that speed boat ride with some of the delegates

After taking lunch the delegates were set to their first experience where they had to "feel" the place by riding White Sand's speed boat taking them for swimming and later in the afternoon some delegates went for the flyfish ride.

At the Puka Beach where the delegates were taken by the speed boat

The delegates had training with Life and Business Coach Clarissa Calingasan at night.

On the second day, the activity began as early as 6 a.m. at station 1 of the beach in Pearl of the Pacific resuming the leadership training and fun games.

Then the delegates went back to the hotel and the training resumes in the conference hall.

I had dinner with the travel team at the D-Mall down the beach which obviously the restaurant serves sea foods. We had a short walk until we reached the hotel.

Dinner at the seaside in D Mall

On the third day, I went to the station again for an early coverage of their activities. Ending the training, they had free time swimming.

The delegates had a free time for swimming after the event

The delegates packed up at 9:30 a.m. after taking the breakfast and awards were given by Clarissa Calingasan to individuals.

When We reached the Kalibo Airport, there was a long queue of people checking in for their flight. The airport was small enough to accommodate passengers waiting for their flight as the airport had also international flights.

We arrived Pasay around 7 p.m. as usual our flight got delayed. Me and my travel team had dinner at Mcdonald's in Resort World, before parting ways.

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Higantes Festival In Angono

Two attempts were made missing the festivity in the last two years since I learned about the Higantes Festival in Angono, Rizal. I live in Cainta, a twenty minute jeepney ride going to the municipality but never I have come across to witness this festivity. Angono is considered as the Arts Capital in the Philippines and is the hometown of two national artists. Lucio San Pedro for music and Carlos Francisco for arts.

December 2011 visit with friend Judith

In the last week of December 2011, a friend of mine dropped by in the town proper of Angono after spending our time from Morong, Rizal where we took several photos in the rice field. We took photos in the municipality, chatted and had coffee in one of their famous restaurants serving a unique delicacy.


Yesterday, I took time going to the Higantes Festival where I witnessed the parade of the Higantes. It is said that the body of Higante is made of bamboo and colorful cloth which the parade of the giants is the main highlight during the fiesta celebration. Higantes are also made of paper mache and measures ten to twelve feet in height. According toe the wikepedia, the Higantes was influenced by the Mexican arts form paper-mache brought by the Spanish priests to the Philippines.


After a few minutes walk in the main high way, I reached the town when the Higantes Parade just started. I took some photos of the people who took part in the parade where the residents threw them water as part of the fiesta celebration. I was careful not being wet by the water they throw to the by passers. Since I was there at noon time, It was sunny and the hotness led me to go home as early as possible. Well the heat of the sun was so enervating and I could not stay any longer in the place so I decided to back home.

Participants of Higantes 2012

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Part 1: Travel Summary for 2012

In 2011, I made a lot of travels starting as early January till November. Since December was yuletide season,  I have reserved this month as a resting period for this endeavor. The biggest travel I had last year was going in Batanes, and some people know that going to this place is more expensive than any Asian tourist destination.

Now that 2013 is quite near, I decided to summarize my travel experience for this year. So below is the first part of my journey.

January:

I started the year with my travel in Calamba, Laguna proceeding to Los Banos where we had a soft hike to the top of Mt. Makiling taking the U.P. Los Banos route.

We hiked to Boys Scout for about an hour reaching the top of the mountain until we found a jewel which was the little girl in the mountain.

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Great Powers Come Great Responsibility

I couldn't imagine how time flies away so fast and since we are in the month of November, it's so easy that one can think that we are approaching the yuletide season and then following shortly is new year. The mystery of days and nights leave the people to wonder how and why time happens so fast that they may even forget what is the date in the day. Then we can always acknowledge when the days passed by, for it can remain as part of the past people will always remember. This is how the yearning is created and mold like a pot of clay which lets us recall the days in our lives and how we've longed for each moment as every our memory flashes in our mind. We tried to acknowledge what the past could bring of joy and sadness, and maybe apply every single mistake in our present situation.

It can't be denied that there's always a beauty in each moment in our lives, whether things you have experienced may be good, bad and even ugly. More importantly is the lessons we have learned from our  yesterdays. And we are shape up through our journey preparing us to become a better human being.

Just a few hours ago, I posted in my Facebook wall with this message "Stages of awakening brings out the good, the bad and the ugly in me...but any of these three doesn't make me a lesser person but more human with substance." I didn't post this message just for my own praises, but this is basically because of my experience being in a realm of awakening. And that experience of mine was undeniable, for it reflects things that happened to me in every single situation. The emotional turbulence and imbalances which led me to question a lot of things in mind. We had the good and the bad that we can't have one without the others, and the ugly things I have partaken during the course of my awakening period. That message was also a personal note to myself of who I am, and how I perceived my condition as lessons being learned in my life.

Each one of us have our own story to tell, as far as awakening is concerned, and it could differ from person to person. In the process, we learn so many things, some valuable lessons that once you put it in your heart, you'll become a better person through changes. The situation affects my relationship towards one another and in this way I can truly understand how to appreciate small things as you and me.

Spirituality is power. And I remember a quote from the movie Spiderman, "Great power comes great responsibility". The notion can also be much of one's responsibility. And in one aspect, my logical mind tried to ask so many questions as my experience in spirituality widens my expectations as my heart rants, "Where are the so-called enlightened one? Where are those who propagate oneness? Why can't they help someone like me who is in trouble. Where are these online people who rally every aspect of spirituality? And why am I having a hard time to reach them out? Is their spirituality embodiment only for show?"

And that questions I had could lead to a blame game and could have troubled me a lot. These are just part of my questionings in the past although I couldn't be blamed for being emotional, because I had my expectations that someone up there would be sincere enough to help me get up, but only few people that I know who came to the rescue and support me. I wouldn't refer this to people who are not in the same realm because they wouldn't really know about my awakening experience.

That time, I have felt there was still an ego running to some spiritual people, although not all of them. And that time I felt that I was an outcast that some people I've looked up to couldn't do their task to reach out. I felt I was overlooked attempting to get their attention to people who I was supposed to spiritually connected with. I was like an angel who doesn't fit to some group of angels, or a soul who doesn't belong to a soul group and that is why and I felt like some of them didn't put aside their ego just to help one soul in their neighbor.

Never mind if he or she isn't part of your group and put aside ego just to help someone who have fallen into pit of darkness.

And  indeed, the truest form of spirituality is the power to reach out those who are awakening and we know that awakening is such a difficult situation to be with. It needs support from the people within, someone to guide them and care without any hesitation to assist both physical and emotional. Not only to nurture them with some information which can be googled by any of the individual. Someone who can be tangible in times that we need comfort.

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Loving My Passion Even More

I just had my camera back yesterday with no clear idea how it happened. That means I'm into my passion of taking photos once again and the difference is that, I have more love to it, seems like I was starting all over again and the love to my passion has grown deeper subsiding some of my negativity and emotional stress. I guess I am happy what God has brought back for me. Somewhere out there, His angels are working on and they were just there once they saw my heart cry. I was like a child, so spoiled and when I couldn't get the things that I really wanted until my cry convinces God to give me what my heart was ranting. You know when the baby cries because he wanted to drink milk convincing his mother to give him a bottle of milk. God, His instinct tells Him it's time to reach out once His Children cry too much for help. And we are the children of God.

MRT Station, Gateway Mall Cubao using my Nokia Lumia phone

Without my camera was an anguish for me, for it took me 5 months to wait and how I'd realized it was too painful when you are deprived from your passion because you were bound to giving in something that you didn't expect to happen. And we know how expensive the cameras are, and you know you can't really get them overnight if you don't have much cash, especially when these cameras are high end one. But it's not about the price, it's about your passion burning inside your heart. And God knows when your heart speak out that when you are in trouble, for we came from the very heart of God. If you are speaking from the heart, people can relate to what you are saying. It is also the same thing when you are singing. Of course it's easy to sing some songs, but if you are singing from your heart, people can relate to the message of the song, on the basis of how you sing it. So God knows when and where He is ready to reach out His heart to the people crying in anguish. As long as you are honest, sincere, true and unconditionally extend your hand to others, God manifests your desire when it is time. And you can't demand right away. It won't happen overnight but He knows what, when, where and how He is going to manifest things for us. Our cries open door if you know your strength of being who you are, being with yourself and being positive.

And that was the clarity of my desire, for God knows out of my passion was love, that love on my passion has grown deeper. It never ages, and the connection that I had has become stronger and through this passion of mine, the core has come closer to the heart of God. Loving our passion is a test for all of us, for it measures how we can learn to love unconditionally.

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Magic

I had a meeting with a friend today and it took place at the Gateway Mall in Cubao. I usually hang-out in Coffee Bean, and alternatively I go to Krispy Kreme which is just only beside the coffee shop. I left home as early as 9 a.m and our meeting ended at 3 p.m. Following shortly I had to leave the place and proceeded to Loyola Memorial Park in Marikina City to pay visit to my mom, dad and brother as this day marks as All Saints Day or Undas.

Some angels come into human form to help us and that when I was least expecting it. I was really bothered then how I can solve that problem and that my morale was really down for a couple of weeks. Little did I know, the universe synchronized things to happen, and manifest the wishes I had hoped for. I was really thankful then and could not believe how it happened. It was like magic! So fast that I ended the questions with the answers already at hand!

Thank you Universe,thanks to the angels, thank God.

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Angel To The Rescue

Today is the last day of the month, as October 31 marks as the Halloween celebration and tomorrow November 1 as All Saints Day. I have not been very busy for the past few days, only for some of the usual things that I do as most of the time I spend alone, in my room with my laptop connected to the internet and make some recordings for my cover songs that pave the away to my vacant time. Being alone is the best time for reflection, the best time to figure out how to solve problems as some of these solutions are given by our Higher Self. While in my room, it also made me think of the life experiences I have grasped along way, particularly this year when I first encountered my awakening. I am just a bit curious about the purpose of my awakening although the answer is no-brainer at all to those who are already spiritually enlightened. As I was always into reflection, it brings back the memories in me spending time to travel and one of those experiences I had was during the Holy Week last April 2012 witnessing the Senakulo or Moriones Festival in Marinduque Island.

Visiting Marinduque was no longer new to me as part of my descendants are from this island. In fact it reminds me about my whole family visiting this place during Holy Week and Mayflower festivities. We used to have a house there and later on it was sold to one of our relatives living in Boac. My reflection in Marinduque had given me so much enlightenment. That time I was also focused in photography particularly in that event and some of my landscape and sunset shots in Gasan, Marinduque. It helped me though to relieve me from my emotional distress as well as the physical pain I have gotten from my awakening; We know that this is not an easy process to be with but I believe that I can see light at the end of the tunnel.

But who would dare to help me in the course of my awakening, and  who would stay with me, give me support and comfort me in time when I was longing and hoping for someone to give me a hand and raise me up and uplift my soul? For someone who is on the same shoes asme can understand what I've meant to say without any forms of judgement. I was desperately looking for a comfort zone and to feel that I am not an outcast. Someone who can truly appreciate me of the beauty of my contribution,

But I do understand that somehow my feelings like this was still part of my awakening. And I know someone up there would be willing to reach out unconditionally. Someone who is an angel in my life who is in human form.

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Cordillera Coffee Sponsors the Awards Night

One of the sponsors in the recently concluded Ernst and Young Entrepreneur of the Year Award 2012 held at Rizal Ballroom, Shangri-La Hotel Makati was Cordillera Coffee owned by Mary Grace Arboleda-Young. We were on the same table as the dinner was served with coffee. She invited me to watch the awards night and it was a great opportunity to witness once again a truly inspiring moments for the entrepreneurs. Last year, she participated at the Coffee Origins held in Greenbelt 5, Ayala Mall in Makati where she gave me 3 pieces of Kape Musang in the said event. I wrote about her coffee business and the awards night last year.

I still have one Kape Musang left and Gae said that I can still consume it even though I kept it for so long. The coffee was in my table that I even forgot to consume it.

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Entrepreneur of the Year Awards Night 2012

Last Thursday, October 18, 2012, I was invited to watch the Entrepreneur of the Year Awards Night 2012 in Makati Shangri-La Hotel. This was my second time around to attend such an inspiring event. This year's theme was all about "Passion" and the winner was Jaime Ayala of Hybrid Social Solutions. Prior to the main award, he was already adjudged as Social Entrepreneur. One of the recipient of the award was actor Marvin Agustin named as the Young Entrepreneur. I was seated with Grace Young, owner of Cordillera Coffee and she was also the sponsor of the coffee in the said event. Gae was a Social Entrepreneur of the year in 2009.

Singer and recording artist Rachel Alejandro graced the event with her popular songs. The event came through almost midnight.

I was really in shape during the event and could not feel exhausted in the entire night.

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Things I Remember Most Last Summer

Biri Island, Northern Samar

It can't be denied that one thing for sure, the ultimate experience I had last summer was my trip from Biri Island, Northern Samar. I took the initiative by taking a bus ride in Cubao Araneta bus station going to Sorsogon City. It was a 12-hour drive to reach the destination, then I proceeded to Matnog, Sorsogon where the ferry boat ride to Allen was located. It was an hour ferry ride to Allen, Northern Samar.

Allen is a small town, there's not really much to see there except for some resorts, so I spent an overnight stay in the resort but there was no internet connection, even when you have an internet prepaid card, you can be connected but the internet was pretty slow that you could hardly open your Facebook account and upload some photos. There was no choice but to go to the port where you can find an internet shop there. You have to ride a tricycle for ten to fifteen minutes that would take you to the port.

Proceeding to Leveriza is the only way to Biri Island where you have to ride a "banka" but you need to wait patiently until the boat is full. Your choice is to rent a boat at a cost of 500 pesos one way, a 45-minute boat ride to Biri Island.

I stayed in Villa Amor Resort at a minimal fee and it was a blissful experience to see the rock formation in the island where you had to cross the water for 30 minutes before you reach this rock. Need to be extra careful as the water reaches your chest when it is high tide. I had an injury in my foot then, because of slippery steps while pacing to the rock formation.

When you've reached and climbed the rock, it was pretty a magical experience.

Going home was a disaster. I took a second rate aircon bus coming from Ormoc with the ferry, when I reached back to Matnog, Sorsogon that would leave the port immediately. Upon reaching the Pasay terminal, the operator wanted us to transfer to another bus but hearing the passengers who came mostly from Ormoc, as they complained about the transfer, I stood before them and I got mad that I wanted to talk to the manager, defending that we would ride the same bus coming from the province and that we would never transfer. I demanded and withstand what was right. So in the end, the operator gave up. The passengers were thanking me because of standing with them from their complaints..

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Home

I love this song, "Home" by Michael Buble/Westlife. I recorded this song in the wee hours of the morning. I also put some of my photos to the video. These shots were from my trip in Baler, Batanes, Marinduque, Cebu, Albay, etc. If there is one good thing happened to me this year, just some of the good ones, is my traveling experiences. It feels like I was in the wave of nostalgia and I miss those travels I had this year. I have been in the stage of soul-searching, reflection and finding myself in me...

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A Matter of Choice

Don't really mind being an outcast, being underdog, being a darkhorse, being overlooked, not being liked, and not being appreciated.. each one of us is unique and special being in our own right..for we can look great in the eyes of others and unconditionally accept the way how other people treat you..After all we can't really please everyone and even someone in our affinity can be totally different how they perceive you ..

For as long as you're being with yourself and do not step into someone's shoes is the way we can make a difference, we can understand the true meaning of life, it's purpose and how we can manifest happiness in our hearts...

We want to be recognized in small things that we do and share, but appreciation may become elusive..but when someone is saying something about your work whether it's good or it needs improvement, is like saying "hey I noticed your work and appreciate your effort" or it's simply like saying "hello, how are you, I care.." And that may possibly make you smile and become thankful as your heart jumps into joy when you hear these words..and that is the power of words, it heals the wound afflicted in our hearts and even make you stronger that the passion burning inside you gives you more inspiration and do the things we want to do. 

Talk about the minds...It is the mind which creates the ego that barrs our hearts to believe what our inner voice is telling us...                                                                       
For it is the ego that builds a wall and block our relationships to one another. It is the work of the ego that disallow us to open our hearts to love, care, to understand and transform oneself and change as God wanted us to be...but still we are given a choice which path that we can walk through and we get the prize when we reach the edge...

It's a matter of choice though...

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Earthdance 2012

I had the chance to witness the Earthdance event on September 23, 2012 at The Arts in The City, in Fort Bonifacio, Taguig. Earthdance is the largest synchronized dance event in the world started in 1996 with a vision to unite the whole world through the universal platform of dance and music.

I went in the event around 5p.m after I accompanied my sister to Pasay to get the package from my brother's friend who just arrived from Dubai. Riding my sister's car, she dropped me off to The Fort. I have seen some familiar faces there, and they were some of my friend's lists in my Facebook account.

I enjoyed the night with foods, wine drinking as the event filled with dances and music and we decided to go home at past 9 in the evening.

I learned this event through an invitation from one of my Facebook friend, who invited me two months ago.

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A Small Voice

There is a small voice within me that is wanting to speak and waiting to be heard that echos in my heart. The words which need to express and let it be spoken. That fear in me is the one that is stopping me to say all the things I have to say, but when these words are release, what a great joy it could bring to my heart. I am afraid, even though what my heart is saying could be true, because that might probably hurt me. A small voice that is part of me whispering I found something I wasn't looking for, when I was least expecting it.

That small voice is also a music to my ear but the melody is unsung but when it is played in my heart, I  hoping someone would listen to it. As the small voice awakens me, sometimes it brings happiness and sometimes it brings sadness.

I can't convince that small voice in me to speak out, but maybe it is not the right time yet to say these unspoken words in my heart. Let my small voice speak up when the right time comes.

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The Feeling of Emptiness

I was making some activities in hope to bring me joy even just for a little while. As I mentioned in my previous posting, the beginning of the year was full of emotional baggage that I can't really cried hard enough and break the pattern, and alter everything I had experience. But I couldn't do anything about it but to accept the path that I am walking through. I was uploading and posting some photos in my Facebook wall and honestly I would like people to appreciate what I was doing by hitting the "like" button from what I did. I find it the Photoshop as something could kill my time the whole day I spend in my room. If I could not edit my photos in the Photoshop, recording some songs was my best alternative. Imagine that I was able to record more than 50 songs that I even posted the video both in my You Tube and Facebook account.

These are some of the things that I do while in the midst of my awakening and dark night of the soul. I keep on motivating myself in doing two of my passions as this could heal me and make me feel better. I know that I was not the only one experiencing this kind of realm as I was looking for a "support" to guide me in my spiritual path.

My business was down due to some reasons that I couldn't think of anything to solve the problem and find solutions as I had a hard time concentrating what to do. I was left with a great responsibility and do not even have the solution to solve this up as the people would never understand what I had gone through since the beginning of the year.

I was still hoping for that happiness to manifest in me, while I was loaded with burdens and the agony that I felt during this path of awakening.

A part of me was missing that I do not even look for that piece, the melody of the song that I sing one day can be heard.

I can be with my friends, go out, laugh a lot and enjoy with them, but the happiness is just temporary just like like the story of the Little Match Girl, to set fire from the matches to keep the flame burning and when it's gone she would light the match again to see all what she dreamed for. So it's similar, in spite of my experience during the dark night of my soul, I need to light the match so I could keep the flame. Going out with my friends may help me laugh but the feeling of emptiness is still there. I couldn't fake myself for that and could not maintain my momentum and that is why, when I was with them, I had to leave them early because it was really hard to feel the pleasure of being with my friends.

During my recent travel, most of the time I have been alone just like the case I was staying in room the whole day. I became dependent on the internet, on Facebook as surfing this site had become my outlet.

How I had really wish for the good ones this year as this can pave away my worries, my emptiness and bring back the smiles I had once, my life and my happiness.

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Still Hoping For The Good Things to Come This Year

Since the start of the year 2012 served so much of emotional baggage in my life. Almost everything was a rough sailing, hoping that things will be alright soon. That was the beginning of my frequent travels I made to the provinces in hopes that this could relieve my emotional ups and downs I had, even just for temporary basis only.  It helped though, even just for a while but as soon as I get home soon, then again would feel the same predicament. I was advised to go with the flow for everything will be alright soon. This was their experience too, to those who have been in the realm of awakening. To those who were not on my shoes would mistaken me as having experienced a depression. Possibly yes as the lead source may have started from the recent passing away of my brother and the gap between my father, mother and brother was not too long. Perhaps that could be the trigger of my awakening.

My spiritual awakening was inevitable though, and I started googling about the signs and symptoms as this was synonymous to ascension process. I had read a lot of information and the possible remedies it could bring me on while experiencing this stage. The path to my awakening had started July of 2011 when I started seeing sequence of numbers in the clocks, plate numbers, billboards and so forth. So I started to wonder why and was looking for that solution. I had a dream in the beginning of the year about a tidal wave was hitting me and it just really made cry as I was a survivor in my dream. So this was the beginning of my outburst..literally it happened. So I had no choice but to travel and that was the purpose why I rusticated in the countryside.

I also felt a present connection that I could not really understand it and intensely it was heating my chest concomitantly with both of my physical and mental status. And I had the propensity to lose my self anytime but still had a high hope that it will be over soon.

The start of the year up and to this point did not really serve me something good and the emotional breakdown that I had suffered was evidently countless. You can tell on my face by seeing my eye bugs grow. And forget about the physical pain for I can endure but not with my emotions.

The year is about to end we have less than three months left before the beginning of a new year, but I hope I can get a good one, even just one good thing to happen in me and I deserve to be happy at this point.

I had so much pains and unexpected turn of events happened to me now and I cry for help and care that I needed most at this point, something I could lean on in the midst of my emotional crises. And I know someone out there will be there for me.

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The Kundalini Awakening

Here's an interesting link about the Kundalini awakening as some people may have experienced this.

 An excerpt from a personal story of awakening:

When Kundalini awakens one invariably feels some involuntary movements of the body, which begin with trembling and shaking, with an intensity varying with different persons. Some experience violent shaking of different kinds, as does a car 

before starting when the dynamo begins to work. Such physical movements are accompanied with a heretofore-not-experienced feeling of pleasure of spiritual awakening, and the brain becomes heavy as under intoxication. These are the first symptoms of an awakened Kundalini and are followed by various signs and experiences too many to be enumerated...

http://www.cit-sakti.com/story/kundalini-awakening-story-chapt1.htm

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The Importance of Trust and Confidence

So we are now in the middle of the month of September and two weeks more before we reach the month of October. Next month can be promising in terms of travel as one of my Facebook peers invited me to go to Sagada. At least I still have more time to prepare physically and mentally for this travel. After all it has been 3 months since the last time I rusticated but that case was purely accidental and unplanned as I was invited to go to Dipolog, Zamboanga and had a short stint stay in Cebu thereafter. I miss my camera, the shots of the faces, facets and natures and those were the things that my heart has been nagging about in the past three months. Some things happened for a reason, but as I mentioned in my previous blog, I had a terrible experience of adversities this year. I couldn't do anything about it, for this situation of mine may be a part of the divine plan as I unlock the mystery of my spiritual awakening. It unleashed my propensity to grow and mature spiritually as that triggers my awakening.

Life sometimes can be unfair, especially when you have some good intentions but it is not reciprocated, although you don't expect it to happen, as you unconditionally trying to reach out some people. Your plans however have the possibility to diminish when you pick the wrong people. And when you put to much trust on one's shoulder but in the end it will show that you are taken advantage of, abused and being retaliated due to confrontational issues. Your trust and confidence is beginning to become tarnish as you found out what the other's agenda is all about. That is why in everything that we do, we pick the rigt people to have trust and confidence with. And it is the ego that sets us apart to the one that we especially trust most.

All the things can be forgiven, forget and surpass but once you lose your trust and confidence towards the other becomes the weapon of destruction to the castle that you have built. The first time around, once a person have made some mistakes can be acceptable but in the second time around, that is where the real problem arises.

It's a matter of trust and confidence you show of being yourself that lets people look up on you as they will try to give respect because of showing the importance of trusting someone. It's more than a gold that one can buy for without losing the identity of who you are,

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